June 28, 2011

Witmer, Smith Announce Weed Merger

EDITOR-PUBLISHER ROBB WITMER AND JANITOR SCARPINO SMITH DURING LAST MINUTE NEGOTIATIONS.


In what many experts are calling the most significant development in pot smoking to occur in Apartment 3 perhaps ever, editor-publisher Robb Witmer and janior Scarpino Smith hammered out an agreement late Friday night that would merge their respective bags of weed into one "super stash," as officials have come to refer to it.

The venture would certainly amount to the largest merger in Apartment 3 history, even surpassing the Q/Dobbins matched joint of 2003. 


Following minutes of negotiations Mr. Witmer and Mr. Smith agreed that combining their respective bags would be a benefit for all those involved.


"I had some weed," said Mr. Smith, "and so did Robb. But if we put it together it would be, like, a lot of weed."


Mr. Witmer was equally enthusiastic. "It's one thing to have some weed, but it's much better to have more weed.


"This will really benefit both sides," he reiterated at Friday night's press conference."We're not going to sit back on our laurels and wait for something to happen. We must be proactive. We're going to put this weed to work for us."


Concluded Mr. Smith, "We're going to get all fucked up."