August 10, 2012

Swine Gonorrhea is No Laughing Matter



BY CELEBRITY DOCTOR ROGER CHAKRAVORTI

Most Apartment 3ers are aware that the swine flu is a very real threat to their health and well being. And why wouldn’t they be? Swine flu gets all the attention in the media, and doctors all around the country are falling over themselves to diagnose and treat anyone with swine flu that they can in the hopes of making the papers.

At Dr. Chak’s Celebrity Medical Clinic we aim to stay on the leading edge of disease treatment technology. That’s why we can’t only be concerned with swine flu, but have to take all swine diseases into account. Here in Apartment 3, there’s a new threat on the horizon that hardly anyone’s talking about: Swine gonorrhea.

We have been treating more and more patients every day for swine gonorrhea. Everyone should be familiar with the symptoms by now: a burning feeling during urination, along with penile or vaginal discharge.

Too many of my patients don’t want to take swine gonorrhea as seriously as they need to. You need to know that the dangers are as bad or worse than human gonorrhea.

I can’t stress enough that just because you contracted gonorrhea via sexual relations with a pig instead of a person, you are still at risk of the disease spreading and causing major complications ahead for yourself, as well as the risk of spreading it to another person or pig.

Remember, just because swine gonorrhea sounds funny, it is no laughing matter, and the same goes for swine herpes, swine syphilis, and especially swine crabs. If you think you may have contracted a venereal disease from a pig, or any barnyard animal, please see a medical professional immediately.