SEATTLE, WA — In an unexpected turn of events, Jeff Bezos — Amazon’s founder and one of the wealthiest people in the world — announced on Sunday that he plans to give away most of his immense fortune to none other than Satan, the Prince of Darkness.
"I've given it a lot of thought," Bezos said during a hastily arranged press conference. "After considering several charitable organizations and philanthropic causes, I've decided that Satan is the most deserving recipient of my wealth."
According to Bezos, the decision was based on the fact that Satan has been "consistently innovative, taking calculated risks, and providing opportunities for countless souls throughout history."
This could be a “game-changer" for the underworld's operations, according to Satanic expert Dicky Bloads.
"With Bezos' financial backing, we can only imagine the advancements coming in terms of soul acquisition strategies," Bloads said. “And of course Hell is already investing heavily in AI, even after their catastrophic losses in crypto last year.”
The announcement has left many questioning Bezos' motives and wondering if the former Amazon CEO had struck a deal with the devil himself.
Bezos, however, insists that his decision is based purely on admiration for Satan's "unique entrepreneurial spirit."
"Game recognizes game," Bezos said.